Announcing

-| two and a half months ago |-

Auntie [clutching her heart, as if experiencing an attack]:  Aye, my god.  Are you sure?

Joshua:  Of course, Auntie.

A:  Is it not sape dere?

J:  I'm pretty sure I will be.

A:  Aren't dere gahngs?  Or drahgs?  Or biolehnce?  Or robbery?

J:  Auntie, there are gangs, drugs, violence, and robberies in America.  Don't worry, I'll be fine.

A:  Aye, my god.  Where are you going pirst?

J:  First, I'm going to India.

A:  And teerd?

J:  Well, I might stay in Africa for a while...
A:  Aye, my god.
J [continuing]:  ... I was supposed to go to Egypt as my third country (but as you know, many bad things are happening there), but I think I might go to South Africa or Australia instead.  Then France, London, and Argentina.

A [picking up her Yorkshire Terrier and holding him close to her chest]:  Aye, just go straight to Prance.  It's nicer dere, no?  People are nicer dere?

J:  Auntie, I'm pretty sure France has a lot of gangs, drugs, violence, and robberies too.

A:  Aye, my god.  What ip you get mahgged?

J:  Then I'll dance for money, Auntie [proceeds to bend over and seductively roll up his jeans.]  

A:  Joshua, I'm not keeding.

J:  I'm not bringing that much with me, auntie.  I'll have a place to stay, where I can keep most of my stuff safe.

A [squeezing the Yorkie, then swallowing some sleeping pills with coffee]:  Aye my god.  You're skehring me.  Imagine what you're mom is apraid op.  Den multeeply dat times ten.  Dat's how I peel.

J:  ... Are you sure about that?.

A:  Ob course!  Can't you change your plans?

J:  Yes, auntie, but I don't want to.

A:  Aye, why not?  Why do you hab to go dere?

J:  It's just something I want to do.  Something I have to do.  Don't worry Auntie, Uganda is going to be great.

-| August 25, 2011 |-

Hello Joshua,

Thanks for traveling with Orbitz.  This email confirms the ticket number(s) issued for the "Entebbe 10/2/11" trip.

Sunday, October 2, 2011:  Bangalore Hindustan to Dubai.
Monday, October 3, 2011:  Dubai to Addis Ababa Bole.

Monday, October 3, 2011:  Addis Ababa Bole to Entebbe.

Watch out, Uganda.

[J:]